O M goodness, so much ground to cover.  I have dealt with quite the emotional roller coaster over the past month.  Ryan and Ammon did finally arrive in Pahrump, Nevada.  I cannot tell you how much comfort it brings me to just know that he is so close to home.  He is with Ammon, Jerry DeLemus, and Pete Santilli.  He also gets to see his dad when they meet at the law library, and at their chapel services.  As bad as incarceration is, he is way more content in the Pahrump facilty than he was at MCDC.  He said that it is maximum security, but he hasn't had to be shackled to move about the place.  They have access to computers and phones, but it is all open, and there is zero privacy.  I am sure that is difficult.  I miss that man like crazy, and I still find myself wishing for his companionship and help in almost everything I do.  I want to consult with him on kids, finances, cars, decisions, school work, homework, discipline etc.  I do get those precious phone calls, but I have to wait for them, and often I forget what I needed to discuss with him.  I am just so ready for him to be with me again. 
     A few things that have also happened, was Arden's farewell.  I was an emotional wreck that week.  The last Bundy guy around, and even though I wasn't hounding him to fix stuff non-stop, he was kind of my safety net...the whole "I will just have Arden fix that."  Then, of course, nine times out of ten, I wouldn't call him, or forget to call him.  But, just the fact that I could call if I needed him...I hate that its gone.  The Bundy men have a rare gift of being able to problem solve just about everything and anything.  It is extremely rare.  I hate that it is gone now.  Because of his farewell, Katie came down from Canada.  We had some great family get-togethers that just made me cry too.  We have such a large and obvious gaping hole in the family right now.  It is hard to go because they are so missed.  I know I need to quit complaining, but our family just isn't ok or the same.  It is what it is.  The fact that Cliven could not be there or participate in his last son's farewell and setting apart was the worst.  I cried and cried about that.  I just can't help it, because it really isn't right or fair.  On the day of the farewell Mo went in to find his church clothes and somehow pulled the dresser onto his head.  It was quite sad.  He had a little bump on his forehead, and yet the bunkbed caught the bulk of the weight.  Only a drawer really landed directly on him.  Anyhow, Arden went to give him a friendly pat and he freaked out and started bawling loudly.  Arden and I were both equally floored.  I finally found that he had a nice bruise on top of his head too.  Poor misunderstood Mo.  Anyhow, we all sang with the siblings and it was a nice farewell and day....except for our obvious broken hearts. 
     Since then, Mikkelsen's moved back into the basement.  They have been generous and have given me the ok to live in the upper floors until trial.  I was scrambling trying to get the ok to move into Grandma Bundy's single wide trailer, or anywhere for that matter.  The sale of my house fell through once again, and I have felt so completely lost for awhile.  I know I am supposed to be gaining wisdom or perspective or something from all of this.  I hope that I can hurry up and learn it.  This whole year has been tough. 
    Ok...no more sob stories.  We also went to Hatch for Thanksgiving, and that was fun.  My dad made a turkey, and his wonderful noodles.  The kids fought and helped haul wood, and my dad let them pick out a Christmas tree.  It was a very nice break.  We missed Ryan, and his fried turkey, but he said that their dinner was decent, and he said that the pumpkin pie was actually good. 
     I also celebrated our anniversary by taking the kids out to visit their dad.  It was a terrible experience...really.  It is what it is.  The monitor's were not working properly.  Pete Santilli was visiting with Deb Jordan and he and Ryan are in the same pod.  For whatever reason, I could hear Pete, but not Ryan.  Deb could hear Ryan, but not Pete, and the monitor was way fuzzy and we could not see each other.  On the ride home, Mo threw fruit snacks at me one by one by flinging them my direction with a dust pan.  Jerusha and Oak got into a huge brawl about where they wanted to ride in the car, and the visit, and the drive just could not end fast enough.  All I can say is, this anniversary will be very easy to top next year.